creeque alley... where it all began.

I have always loved The Mama's and the Papa's, always. Creeque Alley is without a doubt one of my all time favorites of theirs. I have always wondered what the lyrics were in reference to so Stephen mentioned to me that I should look it up and that's when I discovered this article. Amazing. (Check out the video at the end of the post!)

Creeque Alley was released in 1967 and tells the story of the formation of The Mamas and The Papas. This analysis is the result of much painstaking research (by author Richard Thorpe ) some guesswork and a lot of help from many people who have written to (Richard) to add some new spin to a line or two. It continued to evolve until 2002 when the website was last updated. Unfortunately his original web site is gone but his diligent study is preserved here with Mr. Thorpe's kind permission and what a wonderful read it is.

John and Mitchie were gettin' kinda itchy just to leave the folk music behind.

John Phillips had been playing in a folk band known as The Journeymen. The band, whose lineup included Scott McKenzie, played old folk standards but, like other similar bands at the time, were going nowhere. They had split up by early 1964. Later that year John and his wife Michelle formed The New Journeymen with Marshall Brickman and Denny Doherty joined them to play at an engagement in Washington over New Year. By 1965 Phillips was getting restless and eager to try something new. Mitchie is a reference to Phillips' wife Michelle who, as well as singing in The New Journeymen, had been doing modelling work but was to become a singer with the Mamas and Papas.

Zal and Denny workin' for a penny
tryin' to get a fish on the line

Zal Yanovsky and Dennis Doherty had been playing together in a folk trio called The Halifax Three. Halifax is a fishing port in Nova Scotia and may account for the fishing reference in this line, but some think this may be a bit deeper.(Ian Maclure )

In a coffee house Sebastian sat ...
and after every number they passed the hat

Sebastian is John Sebastian. At the time he was playing with Jim Kweskskin's Jug Band and other minor folk bands. "They passed the hat" is a reference to the way some bands were paid in the coffee houses of the sixties. They literally passed around a hat or a basket and more or less took up a collection.

McGuinn and McGuire just are gettin' higher
in L.A. you know where that's at

Jim McGuinn (changed his name to Roger McGuinn in 1967) was enjoying success with the newly formed Byrds and Barry McGuire had a hit with Eve of Destruction - all this at a time when John Phillips was still trying to form a new band. This may also be a reference to drugs, suggesting that before the Byrds became popular they were exploring drug use.(Aaron Stang )

And no one's getting fat except Mama Cass.

This is a reference to the fact that no-one was making any money out of playing folk music but Cass Elliot who, being on the large side, was not only "getting fat" but was also having success as a solo jazz singer in Washington DC. Cass Elliot was born Ellen Naomi Cohen in 1941. Her restauranteur father nicknamed her 'Cass' after the Trojan princess, Cassandra. (Gary Holwell) She adopted the name Cass Elliot during her teens. The name Mama Cass evolved from her involvement with the Mamas and Papas. This is what John Phillips said about Cass in an interview in August 1995 at Paramount Studios: "Her father had a deli there in New York. I remember her as a little, chubby girl, with the stained apron on, behind the counter. (Laughs) We were sort of infamous in that area, and when she got to New York, she knew who we were, but we didn't know who she was. And she had met Denny, and Denny said, "I know this girl that sings wonderfully. We should have her over and sing with her." It happened to be that LSD was actually legal at the time. It wasn't a banned drug or anything. We searched all over the Village and found some contemporary artist who had some and he gave it to us. We were about to take it that night, when the knock on the door came and Cass came in. So we all had it together the same night, for the first time, and I think that formed a bond between the four of us that we just never stopped singing. We just went on and on and on and on, until the trip wore off, which was about four years later."

Zallie said 'Denny, you know there aren't many
who can sing a song the way that you do' (Let's go South)

A reference to Dennis Doherty's singing abilities. "Let's go south" is a reference to leaving Canada for New York which is exactly what The Halifax Three did by way of Montreal, Toronto and then New York.

Denny said 'Zallie, golly, don't you think that I wish
I could play guitar like you'

A reference to Zal's guitar playing abilities!!

Zal, Denny and Sebastian sat (at the Night Owl)

The Night Owl Cafe in Greenwich Village.

And after every number they passed the hat
McGuinn and McGuire still are gettin' higher
in L.A. you know where that's at
And no one's getting fat except Mama Cass.

When Cass was a Sophomore, planned to go to Swarthmore,
But she changed her mind one day

This is a rather oblique reference to Cass' on-again, off-again educational career. She was a very intelligent young woman (an IQ of 165) whose uncles were mostly doctors, and her parents planned for her to go to medical school. But she discovered show business during her last year in high school and dropped out two weeks before graduating. A few years later, with her career not exactly catching fire yet, she attended American University in Washington, D.C. (on the strength of her SAT scores and on a provisional basis since she didn't have a diploma). She did not reach her sophomore year by any means -- by her own admission, she couldn't stay away from the drama department and kept hanging around there instead of concentrating on whatever it that was supposed to be her major -- and she planned to continue at Goucher College (a female college near her home in Baltimore), not Swarthmore College in Pennsylvania , but apparently John Phillips couldn't make a rhyme out of "provisional freshman" and "Goucher." In any case, she dropped out again and went back to singing after a only few weeks.

Standing on the turnpike, thumb out to hitchhike,
Take her to New York right away

This refers to her return to the Big Apple to perform and her probable means of transportation - she was pretty much broke at this point, as they all were. The "turnpike" is the New Jersey Turnpike which is the road from Maryland to New York.

When Denny met Cass he gave her love bumps

Denny loved Cass as a friend. However, Cass was in love with Denny from the moment she had met him during their days with The Mugwumps (see next line). During the group's visit to the Virgin Islands she discovered that Michelle had slept with Denny behind John's back! This caused much tension with the group. In fact Cass went to Michelle and said "you can have any man you want....why did you have to sleep with the one man I love?" For Denny's and Michelle's affair John wrote "I Saw Her Again" and made them sing it as a form of punishment.

Call John and Zal, and that was the Mugwumps

The Mugwumps was a band comprising Denny Doherty, Cass Elliot, Zal Yanovsky and Jim Hendricks (Cass's first husband). "The 'John' in this reference is obviously John Sebastian, who, according to his biography, was an original member of the Mugwumps with Zal, Denny, & Cass just prior to forming the Lovin' Spoonful." (Denise Steffanus)

McGuinn and McGuire couldn't get no higher
but that's what they were aiming at
And no one's getting fat except Mama Cass.

Mugwumps, hi-jumps, low slumps, big bumps,
don't you work as hard as you play
Drink-up, break-up, everything is shake-up
Guess it had to be that way

This refers to the inevitability of the break up of the Mugwumps. In fact they only lasted about 10 months then Sebastian and Zal formed The Lovin' Spoonful. Zal Yanovsky now runs a restaurant in Kinsgton, Ontario called Chez Piggy. "It is in a 150 year old grey limestone building and the walls are covered with memorabilia from his days with the Lovin' Spoonful and his earlier days from the Maritimes and with Denny. Seem to remember some great pictures of the Mamas and the Papas too from his own private collection." (Brad Fallon )

Michelle, John and Denny gettin' very tuneful

Michelle and John Phillips together with Denny Doherty had formed The New Journeymen in 1964.

McGuinn and McGuire just are catchin' fire
in L.A. you know where that's at

They were doing OK in LA I guess! This is also probably a vague reference to riots in Los Angeles in 1965 when a lot of fires were set.

And everybody's gettin' fat except Mama Cass.

Cass Elliot had wanted to join the group but other members were concerned that her size would not promote the right image for the group and that her voice was considered too low to harmonize with Michelle's. This line seems to refer to the fact that McGuinn and McGuire were having more success than Cass. "I think this reference to the Byrds implies they were beginning to get really popular (which reinforces that the first Byrds reference was a drug reference, before they got popular) And "everybody's getting fat" is a double entendre; in other words - everyone's doing great, getting popular, making money etc and Mama Cass is doing well also (because she's not getting fat). (Aaron Stang)

Broke, busted, disgusted, agents can't be trusted,
and Mitchie wants to go to the sea

This is a reference to the Virgin Islands. The New Journeymen was over and they were sitting around one day and just wanted to take a vacation - Michelle, whose home was California, despised the coldness of New York. The story goes that they spun a globe and she, with her eyes closed, pointed to a spot and they decided to go wherever her finger landed - so the Virgin Islands it was. "I heard an interview with Michelle, (I think, but it may have been Cass,) a long time ago in which she ... said the line was 'Mitchie wants to go to the C' (a note Cass couldn't reach and hence had to 'fake it')" (Dennis Honigs)

Cass can't make it, she says we'll have to fake it

This could be a reference to Cass' inability to sing the arrangements that John wrote. As the story goes, Cass was walking down the street in the Virgin Islands when she was hit in the head by a pipe. (Someone threw it from a pile of junk they were going through.) Cass was knocked unconscious. When she awoke, it had affected her range and increased it by 2 or 3 notes. This increase in range allowed her to sing the arrangements that John wrote. Thus, the group's main excuse for keeping her out was no longer an issue. As further support for this claim, Cass once said that the arrangements were so high that at times she would become light-headed during the recording sessions. This suggests that Cass was singing at the top of her range. Furthermore, if you hear any of the Mamas and Papas live recordings, the songs are lowered considerably making the songs more comfortable to sing. BUT... this is a transcript of an interview with Michelle Phillips which appears on the Forrest Gump CD Rom (published by Upstream Multimedia) Question: There was a story we heard about how a pipe fell on Cass in the Virgin Islands and changed her voice.Can you tell us about that? M.Phillips:- Well, John has claimed that Cass actually got her upper range after the pipe fell on her head (laughs). She was walking past a construction site and a small lead pipe fell on her head. And when we were singing ,later on that afternoon, she did seem to (laughs) have a much higher range. I don't know if it 's really true or of there's any reason to believe this story, but it's a lie that we (laughs) told a long time if it's not true. ALSO...The following is a transcript of an email ...which seems to support the view that the pipe incident happened but there is no real evidence that it was the cause of Cass's extended range.:  "I happened to catch a rerun of Behind the Music with the Mamas and Papas on VH-1 and they discussed it with John, Michelle, and Cass's sister.  Basically, they all agreed that the pipe hitting Cass and knocking her out happened. But while John seemed sure that it changed her ability to get "that extra note", Cass's sister didn't seem to believe it at all. Michelle said that the story had been told so often she wasn't sure of anything anymore but that, while she couldn't say that the bump on the head caused it, it did seem Cass was hitting notes afterward that she hadn't before." (David Redd and Maryann Sapanara)

We knew she'd come eventually

Cass Elliot knew that The New Journeymen were in the Virgin Islands. She missed Denny so much that, together with John's cousin Billy Throckmorton, she went down and joined them.

Greasin' on American Express card

The group had an American Express card which was used to finance the trip to the Virgin Islands. It was actually owned by one of the other Journeymen and had been intended for Journeymen business expenses. Of course, no one was making any payments on it by this time, and the group's departure from the Islands was actually precipitated by an American Express representative finally confiscating the card when John went to the local Amex office to get a cash advance on it. Amex was eventually reimbursed with from the royalties from the songs written during the group's stay on the islands.

Tents, low rents, and keepin' out the heat's hard
Duffy's good vibrations, and our imaginations,
can't go on indefinitely

These lines suggest that the group were starting to tire of their life in the Virgin Islands where, amongst other things, they had camped out on the beaches and generally acted in an unsociable way. Duffy's is the name of the boarding house on Creeque Alley (pronounced Creaky Alley but actually spelt Creque's Alley) in Charlotte Amali where some of the group's early songs were composed. (Brian Cornforth) Although Duffy himself was very encouraging and liked the group (giving out good vibrations!) they were not making a living. Their day-to-day existence on the island was very much an exercise in deficit spending and living by their wits and that COULD NOT go on indefinitely. The reference to their "imaginations" not going on indefinitely could also be a comment on how the group felt at the time Creeque Alley was released in the summer of 1967 - they knew they weren't going to last forever (but of course their music lives on all these years later!) This is what John Phillips said about their time on the island in an interview at Paramount Studios in August 1995: "Well see, we went to the Virgin Islands the summer of '65, to rehearse and just put everything together. Cass and Denny and Michelle and I and the doctor who played guitar, and Peter Pilafian, who played violin. All these strange people. We took dogs with us and motorcycles and children. McKenzie, my daughter, went with us. She had her own tent on the beach. We were the last campers to arrive and we got the worst camping site. We called it Camp Torture. There was a mosquito bog right behind it. We went across the main island. We had this on St. John. Went across the main island, St. Thomas, and we got a job there, working at a club, Duffy's - Duffy was a great help to us - singing, and we were trying to sing country pop, folk pop at that time, and we weren't quite sure how to do it or what to do. One day we heard "Turn! Turn! Turn!" - The Byrds - and they mentioned Jim McGuinn, Roger McGuinn now. Denny said, "We can do that. What's the big deal?" So we came back to the mainland and got a drive-away car and drove across the country to California and started recording, almost as soon as we got here."

And California Dreaming is becoming a reality.

Now back in good old New York City, paradise a fading memory, California was looking like the place to be. But this is also a neat reference to California Dreaming, the Mamas and Papas' first recording, which was released in October 1965 and was to go on to become a major hit and all time classic. In the Paramount Studios interview John Phillips was asked how California Dreaming came to be written. He said: "It's my recollection that we were at the Earle Hotel in New York and Michelle was asleep. I was playing the guitar. We'd been out for a walk that day and she'd just come from California and all she had was California clothing. And it snowed overnight and in the morning she didn't know what the white stuff coming out of the sky was, because it never snowed in Southern L.A., you know, Southern California. So we went for a walk and the song is mostly a narrative of what happened that day, stopped into a church to get her warm, and so on and so on. And so as I was thinking about it later that night, I was playing and singing and I thought "California Dreamin'" was what we were doing, actually, that day. So I tried to wake Michelle up to write the lyrics down that I was doing. And she said, "Leave me alone. I want to sleep. I want to sleep." "Wake up. Write this down. You'll never regret it. I promise you, Michelle." "Okay." Then she wrote it down and went back to sleep. (Laughs) And she told me up to this day, she's never regretted getting up and (laughs) writing it down. Since she gets half of the royalties for the writing of the song."

Source

CREEQUE ALLEY BY THE MAMAS AND THE PAPAS:
www.creequealley.com 

today's word of choice is...

op·u·lence 

1. wealth, riches, or affluence.
2. abundance, as of resources or goods; plenty.
3. the state of being opulent.

Today I had to create a piece of art using the word opulence. I just love that word, love it.

Opulence by James Lipp

and the purr's have it!

Yesterday Stephen and I were out running a number of errands and while shopping I decided to purchase a catnip toy for my feline friend. When I had gotten him the same toy years ago he never had any sort of reaction, beyond the batting it around for a few moments and then walking away in disinterest. Now however, things are VERY different. He nearly went feral on the poor catnip filled mouse! Myself being curious about the nature of catnip I found thins article and thought I would share!

Fatty Warhol by Stephen Hernandez

Catmint (Nepeta mussinii) 
Purple flowers. This plant has smallish, grey/green leaves. It grows up to 15 inches high.

The name Nepeta is believed to have come from the town of Nepete in Italy. Cataria is thought to have come from the Latin word for cat.

Catnip is also known by the following names:   Cataria,  Catmint, Catnep, Catrup, Cat's Heal All,  Cat's-play, Cat's Wort, Catswort, Catwort, Chi Hsueh Tsao, Field Balm, Garden Nep, Herba Cataria, Herba Catti, Nebada, Nep.

The active ingredient which causes this is an essential oil called nepetalactone, which can be found in the leaves & stem of the plant. Other constituents include Acetic Acid,  Alpha & beta-nepetalactone, Citral,  Nepetalactone,  Geraniol, Dipentene, Citronellol, Nerol, Butyric Acid, Valeric Acid and Tannins.

When a cat encounters catnip, it usually sniffs it, rubs against it, licks it & finally eats it. It's actually the sniffing that gets produces the high, it's believed that cats eat catnip to bruise the catnip & therefore release more of the nepetalactone. The high produced will usually last between five & ten minutes.

When sniffed, catnip will stimulate a cat, however when eaten it will act as a sedative.

Around 50% of cats are affected by catnip, and those who are, are affected to differing degrees. Kittens younger than 8 weeks old aren't  able to enjoy it's effects. In fact, they show an aversion to it.  The response to catnip appears to be inherited as an autosomal gene. It's not just domesticated cats who enjoy the effects of catnip, many lot of wild species also enjoy it.  Cats can smell 1 part in a billion  in the air. Males & females, entire or desexed, there appears to be no one group who is more readily affected by catnip than another.

Nepetalactone causes a hallucinogenic effect. Some say the effects are similar to LSD, others say similar to marijuana. Because cats roll on the floor, which mimics a female in estrus, it has been suggested that catnip acts as an aphrodisiac, but this is unlikely as males react in just the same way. What is likely is the cat is reacting to similar "feel good" pheromones released during  sexual courtship/activity. However, non sexual behaviour including playing, chasing & hunting can also be observed.  The response to catnip is via the olfactory system. Even cats who can't smell will can still respond to catnip.

The effects of catnip seem to change from cat to cat. I have one cat who drools & rolls on the floor, I have another one who becomes very hyperactive, a third becomes aggressive, and picks fights with the other cats when he's had catnip.
 

Catnip is not harmful to your cat. They won't overdose on it.  Most cats know when they've had enough & will refuse any further offers.
 

Interestingly, researchers say that nepetalactone is about ten times more effective at repelling mosquitos than DEET, which is the active ingredient in most insect repellents. It was also discovered that catnip repels cockroaches too!* Plants aren't alone in containing nepetalactone, some insects & ants also contain it. It's been speculated that this protects them from insects.

Rats & mice are also believed to have a strong dislike of catnip & will avoid places where it grows.

Bloody Valentine's...

Honestly, what is the big thing about holidays? I never really have understood them. Don't get me wrong, I am very celebratory when given a paid day off of work but other then that? What's the big damn deal? 

I guess I never really thought about it. Of all the holidays, the only one I truly enjoy is Halloween. I mean who doesn't love it? But today's blog is not about Halloween. It's about today, which is Valentine's Day. No, I do not normally celebrate it... this year however... I am.

Happy Valentine's Day to You!

 Stephen, this is for you. Made by my own two hands, so shut it. I mean, what were you expecting, something cute, bunnies and rainbows perhaps? Yea, guess again! *WINK*

Happy Valentines Day everyone!

Love,

James

and the clowns have it.

I have always wondered, why clowns frighten me so much? My reaction on seeing one is simply this, to quietly exit whatever building I may be in that moment in a orderly fashion, drawing as little attention to myself as possible. Now that is not my true reaction, because in all honesty I would prefer to sprint from the building, screaming as thought I were on fire. Yes, it could be said once again, I do not like clowns.

So, today I have decided to sit down and try to find the reasoning behind my fear. The following is what I learned.

"Come out and play!"  by James Lipp

Coulrophobia (pronounced kool-roh-FOH-bee-uh) is an abnormal or exaggerated fear of clowns. It is not uncommon among children, but is also sometimes found in teenagers and adults as well. Sufferers sometimes acquire a fear of clowns after having a bad experience with one personally, or seeing a sinister portrayal of one in the media. Some of the symptoms one may experience include;

    •    Breathlessness
    •    Nausea
    •    Dry mouth
    •    Heart palpitations
    •    Inability to speak or think clearly
    •    Trembling
    •    Intense fear
    •    Overwhelming desire to flee
    •    Extreme measures taken to avoid clowns
    •    Sensation of detachment from reality or a full blown anxiety attack

After all I read today, I found this theory by far the most interesting of all.

Clowns have permanent, exaggerated expressions painted on their faces, usually of joy but not always, it renders the observer impotent in measuring facial expression as a precursor of action and for those who are vigilant about their environment, possibly because of past traumatic events, they are unable to interpret and therefore predict what this creature may do to them. This is heightened when we observe the "happy" clown performing some aggressive behavior.

I swear the next time I see a clown I am going to...

You know I had to say one more thing. The experts recommend all forms or treatment for this phobia but nowhere did I see them mention choking a clown with his own jolly & button like nose...

a moment of peace... really?

It's been so very busy for me the last few days. It's been one crazed project after another. Then I thought, who wants to read about that, so in place of some mindless rambling I created this piece fig newton art...

FIG NEWTON ART

I don't meant to bring you down but...

Last night was a typical Monday, like any other. Stephen and I had a pleasant dinner and then we settled on the couch to watch one of our favorite reality shows, TLC's Animal Hoarders. Today's blog is not about animal hoarding but a far more delicate matter... 

ERECTILE DYSFUNCTION

Now you're probably wondering, how did I end here? It's quite simple. I hate cable. I mean I really hate it. Why? I dislike commercials. Especially ones that deal with medications.

Please allow me to continue... it's coming...*GRIN* 

We have all seen them, commercials about one ailment or another, some of my favorites include... 

Avoidance Personality Disorder, Bubonic Plague, Canker Sores, Diaper Rash, Equinophobia, Freckles, Genital Warts, Histrionic Personality Disorder, Itching, Jumping Frenchmen of Maine (Yes, it's a real condition)...  

The list goes on and on but you get the idea, I mean we are constantly under assault. We have this or we have that.

So, a commercial about erectile dysfunction came on and all of a sudden I was terrified thinking that with my twilight years already upon me, is this something else I was going to have to deal with?

Joy. 

Not to worry however, there is a medical cure, a simple pill! Take this bit of wonder and you're up and ready to go and go and well... go some more. 

The commercial continued, I heard all their promises. I was going to be able to last longer, go harder and even faster!  My eyes beheld the images of charging stallions, salmons jumping upstream, and the humble barnacle which has an inflatable penis that is up to 50 times as long as its body! 

But can all is be good? I mean come on, there has to be a trade off. Then I heard it, a barely audible voice, masked behind a wall of assurances.

Some of the side effects include, 

• sudden vision loss;
• ringing in your ears, or sudden hearing loss;
• chest pain or heavy feeling, pain spreading to the arm or shoulder, nausea, sweating, general ill feeling;
• irregular heartbeat;
• swelling in your hands, ankles, or feet;
• shortness of breath;
• seizure (convulsions);
• vision changes;
• feeling light-headed, fainting; or
• penis erection that is painful or lasts 4 hours or longer.
  

Less serious side effects may include:

• warmth or redness in your face, neck, or chest;
• stuffy nose, sore throat;
• headache;
• memory problems;
• diarrhea, upset stomach; or
• muscle pain, back pain.
  

This is not a complete list of side effects and others may occur!

Your fucking kidding me... seriously? I may have to go through all that get it up... 

But that's not the best part! Ready for this? Wonder what happens if the medication works just a little too well? 

It's a sure sign you are now suffering from Priapism!

Priapism is a condition that involves a sustained erection beyond four hours. In Greek mythology, the god Priapus was punished for attempting to rape a goddess by being given a large set of useless wooden genitals. The medical condition named after him is highly serious and requires immediate medical care! 

No, really. A four hour erection? You think that may be a bit much? 

Oh another wonderful fact I discovered. Check this out! 

Do not take *BEEEEEP* if you are also using a nitrate drug for chest pain or heart problems. (Ok, not problem I am not that old yet. Yea!) Nitrates are also found in some recreational drugs such as poppers. Taking *BEEEEEP* with a nitrate medicine can cause a serious decrease in blood pressure, leading to fainting, stroke, or heart attack.

A heart attack, seriously, a fucking heart attack? Wait there is even MORE! 

*BEEEEEP* can decrease blood flow to the optic nerve of the eye, causing sudden vision loss. This has occurred in a small number of people, most of whom also had heart disease, diabetes, high blood pressure, high cholesterol, or certain pre-existing eye problems, and in those who smoke or are over 50 years old. 

So now I can be having the time of my life with someone and then BAM! I am struck blind all the while having ringing in my ears, a general ill feeling and nausea, the swelling in my hands, ankles, or feet followed by a heart attack!

Does it come in a three or six month prescription, sign me up! 

TAKING ONE FOR THE TEAM!

 

My landlord must be related to Norman Bates...

I am telling you... the man is a PSYCHO...

Is your "Company" staying the night?

I do not believe he is truly this psycho, first I could care less if he wears his dead mothers frocks. I have seen some interesting fetish gear over the years, so much so that man in a dress doesn't even get a second glance. What I am more concerned with however is the thought of  the crazy bastard brandishing a meat cleaver in the darkened foyer.

My apartment is, hold on... coffee is ready. I will be right back.

Ok, back... Yes, I know I was only gone a moment. That is because my kitchen is a scant one step from my bedroom. So, where where was I...

My apartment is on the bottom floor of a three floor house. My landlord lives in an apartment above mine. Living above him are three rambunctious hungarian teens. Not sure why I mentioned them as they are not really that important to the story. Oh wait, yes they are but that is not until later... and while I am on the subject of the Hungarians I should mention that my landlord is Greek and his english is at best, well... medieval.

So where does the psycho come into the picture?

How about standing in the pitch dark foyer... watching the street. I mean literally standing there in the dark with his hands in pocket... waiting... watching... for whom knows?

Then there is the unnerving fact that he knows who comes to visit my apartment and how long they stay. How do I know this? Well, that is quite simple. He confronted me outside the apartment the other day and told me, in his broken english that if I continue to have "company" I would have to pay him more rent, as my "company" was costing him money.

Ever have the feeling your being watched...

Now, my gentle readers let me explain to you about my "company". Company is the name he uses for my boyfriend Stephen. Stephen usually came over after seven in the evening and was typically gone by seven the following morning. On average he was staying here about five nights a week. What I am wondering is how this is costing my loving Norman Bates landlord additional? Let me explain... I never cook at my place, simply because I have about four square inches of counter space. Making a cup of coffee can at times be a challenge. My apartment is fairly small so I do not use a lot of light. On a side note, if you ever saw the carpeting I have here, you would prefer "mood lighting" as well. I am the only one that uses the shower here. Let me simply say that if you saw the size and condition of my shower you would more then sympathize with me. So, what exactly does my "company" do here that would cause my utilities to be so high? I have no fucking idea, honestly... Oh, I suppose I should have mentioned that, my utilities are included in my rent Then there is the issue he has with the way I close doors in my apartment. He seems to think I get a thrill by slamming them. Please let me explain... I have the two doors I use in my place, the front door and bathroom. Now given my status of employment, with is being unemployed... it's not often that I charge out of my apartment. Then there is the bathroom door, the one you cannot close entirely as the knob itself has a tendency to fall off... nice place, huh? Classy... So who is this mystery door slammer? Could it be the drunken hungarian teens rolling in around four in the morning? Perhaps he should wait for them in the dark, since he clearly has nothing better to do. How do I know he has nothing better to do? It's because I can hear him pacing in his apartment at two in the morning... I mean who the hell paces at that hour? Perhaps his support hose is not as comfortable now that he is clearly enjoying those fabled golden years? So here I sit in the dark... making not a sound... waiting for Norman to fall asleep... because you know I cannot wait to turn on all the lights, bake a few cakes and to be sure to close firmly the front door after checking for mail at two in the morning...  *GRIN*